“Love is what we were born with. Fear is what we learned here.”
Love or Fear? Should those words really be positioned into a question? If we are born with love in our hearts and taught to fear, then is it really a choice in which road we travel down? I believe it becomes a never ending battle we face in our humanity. The fear could be implanted into our souls at a young age or something traumatic could transpire that plunges us into that dark abyss that is fear. So many key aspects to life could play into how one’s life turns out. Granted, we can not always choose the cards we are dealt but we do have a choice in how we play the game. Sometimes, those choices are limited and despised but they are still our right given to us in free will. That is the core, the heart of true power, isn’t it? The choice. One chooses to live, to die, to go to work, to save a life or to take one. Everyone is driven by those two key emotions in decisions made every day, no matter how simple and unimportant they may seem. There are however those few, which are considered sociopaths, psychopaths, etc who lack the capacity of love or fear but that would be an exception outside the norm and for another time.
Love. The definitions, technically in the dictionary are: 1) A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. 2) A feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend. 3) A sexual passion or desire.
Fear is defined: 1) A distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feel or condition of being afraid. 2) Concern or anxiety; something that causes feelings of dread or apprehension.
There are, again, many factors that can play into a person’s life to fuel them down either direction of love or fear. For the sake of the quote, I will keep it simple or I could be at this all day and I don’t know if I honestly have the energy to pull out the psychology books right now. There’s my choice; laziness. Moving on.
In regards to love or fear, a person is born into a family who raises them. In, instilling morals and rules into that child, depending on how that parent chooses to raise said child, that little person can grow to understand what it means to be cared for and loved and thus know how to care and love another human being. That child (in this example) opens it eyes, sees and only instinctively clings or imprints onto that guardian figure that cares for it. Maybe in a way, for arguments sake, love is something learned as well because of fear. Fear, I wonder, really, how early on does that onset into our tiny brains, generally speaking. I’m not talking about some horrid crime against nature that causes the person to spend the rest of their life healing and improving themselves (if they so choose) in order to function in society. I think it starts as early as when we, as children, do something we are taught as wrong, and fear the repercussions of punishment. I think in engaging into society and school also plays a huge role in fear in that we go out into the world not thinking bad of ourselves until some moron bullies us into thinking we are not worth what are parents spent every waking moment of our lives, convincing us otherwise. And what drives that bully? Fear. Someone did that to them. Maybe their home life wasn’t as supportive and they didn’t learn anything but fear growing up. It’s a vicious cycle, one that will never be broken no matter how hard we try. Fear is indeed taught to us. I’m not saying we never say no to one another. I’m not saying we can not reject an idea or a person, but there are non destructive ways to go about it so that maybe that person will try again and not FEAR it so they choose to give up and hide in a hole somewhere.
What saddens me and is the reason I chose to write about this quote, is how destructive fear is more so than positive. Some fear is good to feel, no? It reminds us that we have something to live for or something to lose and it makes all those goals and promises worth the success in the end. Isn’t it the journey that means more to many than the actual end result? Something else to think on I guess. So as I am easily distracted and can get off track, fear; more destructive than good. If not given the tools to push through fear, especially what isn’t real and only exists in our minds (which is I feel 95% of all fear), then that person can plummet off a cliff and two things could happen. They could succumb and become self destructive to themselves or they could succumb and stop feeling all together..and become self destructive to others. This is the extreme of course, but so many people ignore the signs and then there are mass shootings in schools by children. Kindergartners are being suspended for bringing knives into school. (I’m not talking by accident either, like attacking another student with it deal.) What saddens me is when it gets that bad and people hurt others for kicks or even animals. I think those people are absent love and fear.
How important are those words to you? For me, I have Love or Fear tattooed onto my back shoulder beneath a burning rose. Take it as you will.