Meet the Pack…

~~~~A glimpse into the future…Shadows of the Forgotten~~~~

The crimson sun had set, stripping all rays of light from out of the sky. Any inkling of the moon or stars remained smothered beneath the weighted blanket of despair. A thick, brown fog clung to the treetops, dispersing at it’s leisure across the moss covered ground. The air was stale and humid, causing a constant tickle in Life’s lungs. The putrid scent of death rotting from the inside out, was carried on an infectious breeze as if to infest every living creature with it’s malicious disease. The winds lead the way, beckoning her children to follow, the true messengers of Lady Death herself. Despite the eerie silence, their haunting presence could not be ignored and was indeed a screaming reminder that the darkness was far from desolate.

A familiar, mournful song started some miles away, fading in and out across the winds like a teasing whisper. The howls, at first, were lonely and pleading. They went on in translated sobs of grief that were soon answered by a stronger pair of vocals, their call soothing and reassuring. The howls appeared to bounce off the trees as more of the night’s voices answered, this time not as distant, echoing in a curious, intricate pattern. Soon enough the winds were screaming in protest, angry snarls and growls piercing through the static of howls, alerting any creatures in the proximity to the immeasurable force by the countless voices that threatened the shadows.

The horses began stamping and snorting nervously as an eerie silence fell upon the air. The forest shivered against the winds, the presence of fear creeping along the dirt as some of the horses reared up and whinnied, turning about to sprint away from the open treeline. Normally when wolves howled, it sounded lonely and mournful: A pained soul screaming for release. Yet, when the echo of growls  reached the ears of those lost souls guarding their leader in what could have been blind or misdirected faith, the spitting and snapping had already made it within the nearby shadows and it was too late. The screams of men barely begun, cut short by hungry teeth soaking the earth in blood, sweat and tears and then another warning call was sung: A promise of a bloody reckoning.

Dozens of multicolored eyes materialized only for mere seconds before fading back into darkness. The abyss appeared to open up and part for two even blacker figures; a wispful, mist-like outline of what the imagination only visited in nightmares. Gradually as they continued forward, eyes adjusted to the wolves, amber and golden eyes burned to reflect flames. Again came the distant cries, answering the call of their brothers and sisters and again, into what mimicked drowning in their deafening spell.

They were coming..



“Seduction isn’t making someone do what they do not want to do. It is enticing someone into what they secretly want to do already.” Essence’s gaze didn’t deter from the mirror as she painted the last bit of color upon her lips. She pressed them tightly to blend the red and blue into a dull purple, somewhat to match her violet orbs. After a few moments of teasing her auburn curls, her emotionless gaze focused on the delicate scar that trailed from beneath her left eye and down her cheek. As her stare lingered within, the silver lining that encompassed her pupils began to swirl against the glow, causing purple mist to flash. At first it seemed like nothing changed. A small smile hinted at the woman’s success, her fingers scaling the smooth and now flawless skin of her own face. The scar was gone. 

“ that is pretty complicated.” A voice echoed from behind the Biombo; a decorative dressing screen Ess had personally painted black with pink cherry blossoms raining down towards the earth. The young girl, who couldn’t have been more than fifteen, peeked out from behind her cover, a distrustful look crossing her features. “How do you even know what someone secretly wants, if it’s such a secret?”

Ess sighed, letting her eyes close and releasing the mirage so that the ugly scar across her cheek reappeared to it’s proper place. Slightly annoyed, she turned with a sudden burst of energy, opening her eyes as her fingers snapped out to grab the younger girl roughly by the arm and pull her into view. “You don’t need to read minds in order to see what is in the eyes. If that’s too confusing for you, then you start with body language. Are they standing facing you, wanting your attention? Are they close enough to feel the teasing of their body heat? Do they take that extra step to reach out to you? Sometimes they aren’t even that bold. Sometimes…” Ess’ lips parted in a pitying smile, casually straightening the girl’s gown and shaking her head at her ponytail, snapping the threads so blond hair cascaded down past the girl’s shoulders. “Sometimes they smile, but if you look into their eyes you can see the cold and the darkness, all warning signs. But then, some look terrified and yet the excitement is clear as day, beaming behind those same eyes.

“I’m not pretty enough, like you..” The girl said finally, her grey eyes absorbing Ess quietly.

“You don’t need to be pretty in this line of work..and it’s debatable if pleasant features are really a curse more so than a blessing. Consider yourself lucky you were able to hold onto your..virtue for so long. I was merely eight years old when they stole my spirit.” Ess sighed, placing a comforting hand upon the girl’s shoulder. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry.”

“Sorry?” The girl gawked, a bit confused.

“You’re actually quite beautiful and you’ve attracted the eye of Hector. Even if you were to soak your face in acid, he’s seen something in you that  he deems special compared to the other girls and I think that is why they… long..” Ess’ gaze shifted uncomfortably and she twitched at a heavy knock at her bedroom door, quickly pushing the girl forward and bowing her head obediently as the door opened. “Don’t look into his eyes..” Ess quickly whispered, seconds before the girl was escorted out the door. The girl tried to ask Ess why she shouldn’t look into the man’s eyes but Derek was waiting by the door, his cold stare watching Essence carefully, a sudden, snide, sneer parting his lips.

“Hurry up, Reina…don’t make me clip those wings, we clear Birdie?” He scoffed, slamming the door behind the girl as she passed through.

Reina. Was that the girl’s name? Ess hadn’t bothered to ask this time. She hadn’t bothered to know a single thing about this girl. Their time together was not nearly enough for Ess to warn her or to give much advise on how to survive. Part of her wasn’t even sure if ‘Reina’ was better off going out with a fight especially after the last time she tried to interfere. What a disastrous mess that had turned out to be. Still, Derek gave Ess the task of preparing those girls for the inevitable and it sickened her to the core. It was as if the man enjoyed the pain it would cause Essence, so she hid her emotions. She couldn’t escape and she couldn’t do much to help Reina with her fate except to release her pain from the present moment. Reina would either fade away without a care or she would survive only to relive it in her nightmares.

Derek was slow these days and was usually easily distracted by Ess’ painted smile; that same smile that she had decorated on Reina. Lucky for her she knew the key ingredient would be most beneficial in subduing the young girl’s pain. Ess only heard the screams for a few moments before the dreaded silence came, her own mind growing numb as a single thought passed of her only friend who lived in the other side of Blackpond.

‘Jakey…I pray you never find out…’



Note: Just a random bit that could be a flashback for Essence to Shadows of the Forgotten..


My Friend Camila took the next step in the short story, ‘Ghosts’. Enjoy!

Blackbird's Nest

My friend Sarah said I could sic Luckas on this lady from her story, so I have… Sort of. *smirks*

This post in a response to her story: Ghosts


“Why did you stop?” The woman questioned. “We were just getting to the good part.” Her tone was soft, nearly sweet, sickening sweet. “Are you afraid of what comes next?”

Green specks of light slowly faded into absolute black, Luckas closed his eyes for a moment while the visions of her past faded from his sight. At first ignoring the woman’s questioning he stood from his seat, dipping his hand into his pocket and quickly swallowing the contents of a vial kept within. “I need a small break, I’m not the kid I used to be it seems.” He muttered finally, leaning against the open window and taking a long glance at the white specs that added to the fluffy…

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Italo Calvino said: The more enlightened our houses are, the more their walls ooze ghosts. Describe the ghosts that live in this house:  Image credit: “love Don’t live here anymore…” – © 2009 Robb North – made available under Attribution 2.0 Generic


Brick by brick, Thomas laid down the foundation for his life. Brick by brick, Elsa felt the links added to her chains. It weighed her down, his smile and gentle kisses. She felt like she was drowning at the bottom of the lake she could see from her bedroom window.  She loathed the way her soul trembled at his touch or the way she would twist and moan when he nibbled upon her flesh. Each night she would cry out for more and each morning she wanted to smother him with his own pillow. Elsa would spend hours just watching Tom sleep, imagining how he would thrash and gasp for air as she stole it from him, inhaling his breaths in silence as he slept. Never had he raised a hand against her or given her false hopes. Thomas had been everything a family could want. A loving husband and a dedicated father, but it didn’t change the matter whenever she closed her eyes all she saw was the man’s demise.

“He left us…he’s not coming back..” Elsa stated firmly, not a  glimmer of remorse as she muttered a half assed explanation on the whereabouts of the children’s father.

“Why? Why would he leave? Where did he go?” Glen pleaded, desperate for answers while his younger brother Joseph sat on the floor before the fireplace screaming for their father.

“SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP JOE!” Elsa screamed back, her delicate hand flying through the air to leave a small, reddish welt upside the child’s cheek. “He left us! He didn’t love us! He’s not coming back, so we just have to learn to survive without him!” The mother’s eyes, normally a bright emerald green, were almost black in the shadows casted across the walls by the flames. The detached and cold glare that penetrated through the boy’s skin, commanded them both to cringe and huddle together in fear from their mother’s anger.

“No…Daddy..loves us…” Glen whispered bravely, his voice trembling and cracking as his mother’s arm snapped outwards to grip the boy’s arm. Elsa squeezed his shoulder to firmly keep Glen in place, Joe intertwined  around his brother’s other arm, thus commanding both into unquestionable obedience as she crouched down to their eye level. When Elsa locked with her boy’s baby blues, the familiar green of her eyes glistened like starlight, acting like a shroud harboring a desolate darkness to reveal tiny flecs of black tearing through her irises. Something wicked had escaped the woman’s facade.

“..Then..why did he leave us, if he loves us?” Elsa whispered back to Glen, her voice slicing through the silence like a hot knife through butter, venomous and deceit dripping off her meaning. When the boys didn’t answer the woman smiled, a condescending sweetness against her frightful stare. “..Because….my boys…he does….NOT…love us…maybe ..maybe he couldn’t take you two anymore with your lies and mischief? Maybe he found himself a  WHORE…to keep himself warm. Think of whatever reason you want…it doesn’t change the fact that he is gone..and he’s not coming back.” Elsa cleared her throat, gently releasing her grip as she pushed herself back to her feet. “Now, run outside to play while I finish dinner..”

The boys hesitated for a moment until their mother turned her back to them and they bolted out the door hand in hand. Glen did not even slow his pace as he picked up a lantern on his way out that sat beside the front  door. There were only a few moments of sunlight left as that distant beacon hovered over the horizon. Strange on this day, the reflecting light cascading down the hillside and shadowing down the treeline, mimicked a blood red, mirroring the sky’s swirls of violets and blacks in the lake’s murky waters. The sun popped out, painted almost and foreboding with wisps of red clouds clustered around the light, dripping like blood off a wound, as it faded behind the earth.

“Glen…” Little Joey whimpered behind his older brother, tugging lightly on his sleeve. “Why would Daddy leave without us?”

Glen was silent for a long time as he watched the sun disappear and the stars begin to flicker down from the indigo blanket above. He casually lit the lantern that hung at his side, raising it beside his face as she lead his brother down towards the lake, the sounds of crickets and katydids chorusing into their familiar song that brought a strange amount of comfort, however brief. Finally, the boy turned to his brother with a sigh, picked up a rock and skipped it casually across the lake. His blue eyes rippled just like those waters with tears he struggled to hold onto as he answered with a ‘matter of fact’ tone to his brother’s question. “Dad…left ‘Her’. He didn’t leave us. “

“He..didn’t bring us with him, Glen…he left us with her…” Joey began to sniffle, copying his brother by picking up a rock and trying to skip it across the water’s surface.

“Maybe he’ll come back…” Glen whispered, unsure of his own words.

“Why can’t we go look for him? I want to go with Daddy.” Joey muttered.

Glen looked away from Joseph, his shoulders slumped in a defeated gesture when he didn’t have an answer for his brother. He felt the same as he did. Glen wanted to leave and search for their father, but he was afraid. Afraid of the world, afraid of their mother coming after them, and afraid that he wouldn’t be able to protect his little brother. “Maybe..” He began, his voice cut off from sudden snaps and snarls of wild animals coming from behind a small shed next to their house. It startled the boys, but nothing unusual for them except that it was a sudden and violent noise. It was common for wild animals to come close to their home at all hours, and even more so in the evening looking for food. The shed over the hill a little ways, was where their father would butcher any game he caught from either traps or a daily hunt.  The smell of blood was enough to attract other predators to come scratching at the door and if they got inside, it was possible for them to fight over a nice piece of venison.

Motioning over to Joey, the boys ran up to the house, Glen handing the lantern over to Joey so that he could pick up an axe that laid against a tree stump by the back door. Sometimes they found racoons fighting over the innards left over from gutting a carcass, but most of the time they would find coyotes. The moment Glen and his brother were seen though, whatever the beasts were, scattered and yipped off into the tall grass towards the woods, flickers of amber in their eyes catching the light from the lantern. The door to the shed was open and not broken into, but as if someone forgot to click the latch. As the boys moved in closer to inspect their surroundings and insure that no little creatures were left inside, Glen turned to close and lock the door. At first, he didn’t notice anything. It was dark, and the light from the lantern only sent a tunnel beam of light between the floor and the ceiling. It was when he almost slipped that he noticed the  pool of blood that had spilled from inside the shed and escaped from the gaps beneath the door. He bent down to inspect the blood further, noting how it had thicken and was cool to the touch.

“Joey..hand me the lantern…”

“What is it, Glen?” The boy gawked in a disgusted expression, handing the lantern over as asked and stepped back a bit to give his brother more room. Glen raised the lantern over his head as he stood, illuminating the hooks that hung from the shed’s ceiling, and instantly dropped the lantern to clang and snuff out from the force. In the few seconds Glen’s eyes focused, he had witnessed a large human torso, skinned and missing all appendages, hanging from several hooks, blood overflowing from two buckets that had been lazily placed beneath. He wasn’t sure his eyes were telling him the truth nor was he certain his brother had glimpsed the same horror. The second the light disappeared and the kids were draped in darkness, Joey squealed, causing Glen to spin around. The silhouette of his mother was outlined in the shadows, one hand gently petting Joey’s head in a loving gesture while the other hand  carried one of his father’s meat cleavers. For a moment, the mother and son just stared at one another in silence until Joey’s whimper brought Glen back into reality.

“You..left the shed door open…” Glen whispered accusingly, using his foot to close the door behind him, not needing to look as he instinctually latched the lock.

Elsa snickered, a dry laugh echoing into the darkness causing Joey to squirm where he stood, the woman, gripping a tuft of his hair to coerse Joey to a statue stance. “…I know..” She answered with a hint of fake regret. “…I had my hands…full…I was coming back out to lock it…but I see you boys were being helpful. Coyotes again?” The woman asked, tapping the blade along her thigh in a look of impatience. Before Glen could answer, the wind did so for him, as it carried an eerie and ravenous howl from just beyond the lake. Elsa stiffened, loosening her grip some on Joey when he yelped in fright.

“…No…Wolves…” Glen muttered, somewhat amused by the answer but too uncomfortable for his discovery and the awkward and threatening position his brother was currently in. He wanted to scream or curse. He wanted to demand answers to a sickening ache that was curdling at the pit of his stomach, but he was scared. He didn’t need to see the look in his mother’s eyes to know his brother was in danger.

“Well…we best get inside then…dinner is almost ready.” Elsa said in an overly cheerful voice, placing a guiding hand on Joey’s shoulder as she pushed him towards the house. Elsa waited until Joey was past the back door before turning back towards Glen, unworried that he still held the axe. A clear confidence was in her smile as she leaned against the doorway and waved Glen forward. “Come on, hun…come inside and sit down to dinner with your mother. Trust me, you are better off here with me than with your father…”

My Soul That Never Sleeps

My Soul That Never Sleeps

You’ve haunted my dreams, a distant time ago….

Lurking beneath faint realms of my mind…

A familiar chill reminds me of your soul..

A detached despair, surging down my spine…

Speak to me, I ache to hear your voice..

My lips know your name..

Calling to you in fear..

Afraid to let you go..

Afraid to have you near..

Surrender to me…Surrender inside my head..

Your smile is contagious..

A darkness beneath the light..

One of pain  we harbor in shadow…

Still, those red eyes deceive..

Beaming within to kindle my soul..

My lips know your name..

Calling to you in fear..

Afraid to let you go..

Afraid to have you near..

Surrender to me…Surrender inside my head..

A lullaby to soothe my spirit…

A soul that never sleeps

I wish you would hold me close

Like you do in our dreams..

Our only haven for reality…

My lips know your name..

Calling to you in fear..

Afraid to let you go..

Afraid to have you near..

Surrender to me…Surrender inside my head..

We’re brave enough to stand alone..

Choices taken  to endure it all..

Like when we danced in the rain..

Or the night you almost died..

Even when  we’re so far away..

My tears echoed when I cried

Your lips know my name..

Calling  to me in fear..

Afraid to let me go..

Afraid to have me near..

Surrender to me…Surrender into my arms…

~Essence- Shadows of the Forgotten~

An original song/poem intended for my character.

Spring Storm…

Taken from my original works…

Snuff-Slipknot For Musical Inspiration.

“Luckas…” Ess breathed, opening a solemn stare, her orbs focused intently upon the flames before her. Tilting her head she rested her chin upon her hand, propping herself up from where she laid upon the grass, her free hand absently sifting through the soft blades basking in their gentle touch.

“Luuuuckaaas….” She whispered softly, Tala lifting her head to glance at Ess curiously, the only other movement around her perimeter. A sudden chill crept up Ess’ spine, sending warm shivers along every inch of her skin. Her eyes flickered in their violet incandescence, catching the light from the fire before blinking as a drop of water fell from the sky and hit her lashes. A powerful silence fell upon the wind; she couldn’t even hear the panting of Tala or her pups anymore. All of it seemed…distant. Even the crickets.

Ess let her stare travel towards the dark clouds above, a sudden rumble of the heavens deafening her ears causing an excited smile to curl her lips. Slowly she sat up, leaning back against the log beside the fire, several more specks of rain gaining in speed to disperse sparingly across her bare arms. Running her fingers through her loose curls, the air grew cooler in the stickiness of humidity, the smell of wet soil filling her nostrils seconds before the sky opened up and cried down upon her in an unrelenting force.

Essence giggled, slightly startled by a loud crackling and snapping of thunder, the air lighting up in a white haze. Her eyes darted side to side, another clap of thunder and a collision of clouds came together in sheer blackness, and an invisible fog  seemed to lift off the ground. All she could hear were the rumbles above and a river roaring in her ears; her body soaked in seconds.

Again came the shivers, her eyes slowly rolling  up in her head as they closed and the biggest smile opened her lips. An unmistakable fit of laughter shook her shoulders, adding a weight to cause her to almost double over. A blink of an eye was all it took for her to be squinting through the downpour, sloppily pushing her sagging curls off her forehead. A surge of energy ached in her belly and into every vein, jumping to her feet and staring up into the sky. The darkness irradiated to a soft tone, the clouds swirling like wisps of smoke. Essence stretched out her fingers, twirling gradually in place and leaping left and right to kick and splash in the massive puddles; a flicker of innocence that commanded everything else to static. A moment of peace.

Then, just as quickly it came, the rain slowed to the clouds breaking and a hint of crimson light from the setting sun teased her eyes from beneath those shadows. For a moment, she forgot she was alone and when she looked around, the crickets crept their way back around her. Ess sighed contently, her focus on the fading thunder as it rolled west towards BlackPond. Her eyes found their way back to the fire, smoke trailing upwards from scorched coals drowning from nature’s tears. Tala had not budged herself, several layers of fur dripping water in slow motion  to the ponds below. “Life should be about dancing in the rain and not waiting for the storm to pass…” Ess whispered, the gentle breeze coming to a standstill as the rain drained off the leaves, which led her to notice a few patches of blue  lilacs scattered beneath the Oak. Ess stepped before the massive tree, kneeling down in front of  the spot Luckas usually occupied, fingers gently tracing the bark. Lost in thought she sighed, leaning against the Oak, hugging her knees to her chest as she let herself drift off into that place between dreams and reality.

~Shadows of the Forgotten~

What Drives Humanity…

“Love is what we were born with. Fear is what we learned here.”
~Marianne Williamson~

Love or Fear? Should those words really be positioned into a question? If we are born with love in our hearts and taught to fear, then is it really a choice in which road we travel down? I believe it becomes a never ending battle we face in our humanity. The fear could be implanted into our souls at a young age or something traumatic could transpire that plunges us into that dark abyss that is fear. So many key aspects to life could play into how one’s life turns out. Granted, we can not always choose the cards we are dealt but we do have a choice in how we play the game. Sometimes, those choices are limited and despised but they are still our right given to us in free will. That is the core, the heart of true power, isn’t it? The choice. One chooses to live, to die, to go to work, to save a life or to take one. Everyone is driven by those two key emotions in decisions made every day, no matter how simple and unimportant they may seem. There are however those few, which are considered sociopaths, psychopaths, etc who lack the capacity of love or fear but that would be an exception outside the norm and for another time.

Love. The definitions, technically in the dictionary are: 1) A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. 2) A feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend. 3) A sexual passion or desire.

Fear is defined: 1) A distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feel or condition of being afraid. 2) Concern or anxiety; something that causes feelings of dread or apprehension.

There are, again, many factors that can play into a person’s life to fuel them down either direction of love or fear. For the sake of the quote, I will keep it simple or I could be at this all day and I don’t know if I honestly have the energy to pull out the psychology books right now. There’s my choice; laziness. Moving on.

In regards to love or fear, a person is born into a family who raises them. In, instilling morals and rules into that child, depending on how that parent chooses to raise said child, that little person can grow to understand what it means to be cared for and loved and thus know how to care and love another human being. That child (in this example) opens it eyes, sees and only instinctively clings or imprints onto that guardian figure that cares for it. Maybe in a way, for arguments sake, love is something learned as well because of fear. Fear, I wonder, really, how early on does that onset into our tiny brains, generally speaking. I’m not talking about some horrid crime against nature that causes the person to spend the rest of their life healing and improving themselves (if they so choose) in order to function in society. I think it starts as early as when we, as children, do something we are taught as wrong, and fear the repercussions of punishment. I think in engaging into society and school also plays a huge role in fear in that we go out into the world not thinking bad of ourselves until some moron bullies us into thinking we are not worth what are parents spent every waking moment of our lives, convincing us otherwise. And what drives that bully? Fear. Someone did that to them. Maybe their home life wasn’t as supportive and they didn’t learn anything but fear growing up. It’s a vicious cycle, one that will never be broken no matter how hard we try. Fear is indeed taught to us. I’m not saying we never say no to one another. I’m not saying we can not reject an idea or a person, but there are non destructive ways to go about it so that maybe that person will try again and not FEAR it so they choose to give up and hide in a hole somewhere.

What saddens me and is the reason I chose to write about this quote, is how destructive fear is more so than positive. Some fear is good to feel, no? It reminds us that we have something to live for or something to lose and it makes all those goals and promises worth the success in the end. Isn’t it the journey that means more to many than the actual end result? Something else to think on I guess. So as I am easily distracted and can get off track, fear; more destructive than good. If not given the tools to push through fear, especially what isn’t real and only exists in our minds (which is I feel 95% of all fear), then that person can plummet off a cliff and two things could happen. They could succumb and become self destructive to themselves or they could succumb and stop feeling all together..and become self destructive to others. This is the extreme of course, but so many people ignore the signs and then there are mass shootings in schools by children. Kindergartners are being suspended for bringing knives into school. (I’m not talking by accident either, like attacking another student with it deal.) What saddens me is when it gets that bad and people hurt others for kicks or even animals. I think those people are absent love and fear.

How important are those words to you? For me, I have Love or Fear tattooed onto my back shoulder beneath a burning rose. Take it as you will.